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[quote=Anonymous]I’m kind of at my wit’s end with my son.  He has struggled with school since kindergarten and was put on an IEP in second grade for behavioral problems.  Most of the problems were him getting frustrated and throwing some kind of temper tantrum.  They did behavior charts and had goals for him and rewards if he met them.  This went on for several years without any real progress.  He spent a lot of his time at school sitting in the back of the classroom with headphones on reading textbooks and other reading materials the teachers had in the room.  He did his schoolwork either at home with me or with his special Ed teacher at school.  He always did the bare minimum, if that.  
By seventh grade, he was behind in several subjects.  He is developmentally behind in fine and gross motor skills and struggled with handwriting.  He also really struggled with math and grammar.  
I pulled him out of school and homeschooled for two years.  I took him to an OT to work on handwriting, and we worked to get caught up on grammar and math.  I also taught him to type.  ( I’m an ER doctor, and I was able to go part time and take evening/overnight shifts to be home with him).  He was also in a homeschool co-op and seemed to be doing okay.  He was still fighting me the whole time, though, and we decided he should go back to school.

So, he is a freshman in high school now.  He is very kind and polite.  He has a normal IQ.  He has an IEP and support from staff.  But he just doesn’t seem to care.  Whatever punishment he gets, he just seems to accept as his lot in life.  He had detentions nearly every day and Saturday schools nearly every weekend for skipping classes (mostly PE) his first semester, and he failed every class.  He lost tons of privileges at home, and he just sort of hangs out and reads computer coding manuals or plays with his siblings.  Right now he is making homemade pizzas with his sister and telling her about Linux.  
 
He is in danger of failing again this semester and just doesn’t seem to care.  I sit down with him to do his school assignments, and he doesn’t want to do them.  I worked with his teachers to get modifications, and he just says that he is bored or not interested.  Sometimes he will get motivated for a week and start to get caught up, but then he falls behind again and he gives up.

He has been diagnosed with level 1 autism, but I’m not sure that really fits.  He is seeing a psychiatrist and a therapist and is in a social skills group that he enjoys.  
He is on a mountain biking team that he likes.  He treats races just like normal bike rides, which is fine.

What do I do here?  Do I send him to military school?  Do I just need to accept that he probably won’t graduate high school and he can get a GED later if he wants it?

Thanks to anyone who took the time to read this.  It’s nice to sort of get it out.  I appreciate any thoughts!

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