Reply to Women: do you feel like you became invisible, or treated worth, starting in your 40s?

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[quote=Anonymous]I feel it. I had heard about it and I didn't doubt my friends who said it happened, but I am really feeling it and it's worse than I thought it would be. I thought maybe it would be nice to get rid of certain male attention, and that I might enjoy being kind of incognito in the world.

But the reality feels awful. People look right through me or seem annoyed when they have to deal with me, even when I'm being pleasant and polite.

Also, very depressing: the effect is 100% worse when my grays are coming in around my temple, or I don't wear makeup, or I'm dressed in more "middle aged lady" clothes (like an LL Bean fleece and jeans or something, as opposed to professional clothes or a dress). I'm healthy and fit with attractive, symmetrical features, so it's not like I look like a troll on a no makeup days with a few grays coming through. But I get treated MUCH worse when I look like this than if I color my hair and put effort into looking more feminine and younger. Even by people (like other women) for whom it really should not matter.

Wondering if others feel this way.[/quote]

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