Reply to Pew survey of 18-34 year-olds and parents of 18-34 year-olds

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have a 22 year old post-grad (full time employed) living at home.

My husband and I were pretty shocked when kid asked if they could move back home.  For different reasons we didn't have (or even want) that option post college, so it has been a challenge to understand.  Regardless, we have noticed that our kid is generally less mature than we were at the same age.  Kid has acknowledged the need to work on personal habits, and generally, the arrangement is working.

I think kid would definitely move out if rents weren't so high, but seems to enjoy the comforts of living at our home (home cooked meals, use of car, etc).

As a parent of many kids, it has made me re-think the expectations of grown and flown.  How long into our late 50s will we be subsidizing our kids?  We also have fiscal burdens from our elderly parents.  It feels like the hands-on parenting job has gotten extended by several years in today's world (post-Covid, high rent, etc.). It also feels like we need to re-think our projected costs for the next decade.

I do agree with the study that we are "more connected" with our post grad kid than we were with our parents.  But I also think that a big part of growing up is being truly on your own.

One last point - neither my husband or I would have even considered moving back in with our parents - I would have rather lived with multiple roommates in a studio - so maybe this says that we have stronger relationships with our kids?  That would be a nice outcome as it's very important to us to maintain strong relationships with our adult kids (since those with our own parents have been strained).  [/quote]

As a parent, this has to be a difficult situation. It's best to push them out of the nest.

Personally, I don't buy this "rents are too high" stuff. I think a lot of this is expectations management. When I first moved to DC in 1995, rent was high for me, too. You know how I managed it? I lived in a group house. That also gave me a built-in social group in my early 20s.

I think some of these kids are accustomed to a certain lifestyle and think they should be living it immediately after college. I don't think it's ever been the case that recent college graduates can immediately afford an UMC middle class lifestyle with an apartment/home, car, etc. right off the bat. They GET there.

[/quote]

Can you share your personal experience about pushing your kid out of the nest?  I've done some independent research and the going rate for a bedroom in DC in a not completely sketchy area is about $1400/month, which is far higher than the $800/month that I experienced in manhatten in the mid 90s.  My kid makes a salary of $40k - pretty tough to swing $1400/month rent on that salary.  Kid lived in a dump at college so that's not the issue here.[/quote]

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