Reply to Friends in midlife

Forum Index » Eldercare

Reply to "Friends in midlife"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don't think it's weird. Does it bother you or are you content?[/quote]

I miss having really good friends to do very casual stuff with, like watch a show, go out shopping, laughing, just being content with each other with zero pressure. I don't miss more formal, more acquaintance type friendships that require effort because I am such an introvert and to me it is anxiety-inducing and hard. I think that is partly why I have no friends now: that in-between, not friends yet and getting to know someone part feels very difficult for me, and I haven't met anyone in the past few years I really click with more deeply or with ease.[/quote]

OP I feel the exact same way. It's not that I don't want to put effort into friendships, but starting in my late 30s, it felt like most of my friendships were in this perpetual 3rd date state, where we only ever got together at a direct invitation to go do something. So like if I had tickets to a concert or wanted to go see a museum exhibition, I could definitely find someone to go with me. But I didn't have friends who were more casually in my life who I might just grab a coffee with on a Saturday for no reason other than us both being free.

And part of the problem is that I don't really mind doing stuff on my own. Like I don't really need someone to join me at a museum exhibition, and depending on the person I might actually rather go alone. I got tired of having to invite people out in this formal way and kind of entertain them (or be entertained by whatever they invited me to). So when Covid happened, I just stopped and never started back up, and now I'm in this situation where I technically have friends, but we're not very close and rarely see each other.

I just want a way to get past that formal phase. I am not sure how that works at this age. Everyone has work and kids, many have spouses who are the basis of their social lives. For some reason this combines to make casual, easy friendship harder.

I think a lot of us are in the same boat.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics