Reply to Was my mother gaslighting me? Was this some strange byproduct of a personality disorder?

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[quote=Anonymous]I’ve long thought my mother suffers from some sort of personality disorder. She had an abusive upbringing, suffered from eating disorders (probably still does), has anxiety and depression, and is just generally difficult and controlling. I say this for reference, and for what it’s worth.

I was reading a book and was suddenly HIT by two memories from my teenage and young adult life that I had forgotten about. Now I can’t stop wondering what they meant.

When I was a late teen, I got my first boyfriend, and after he would visit and then leave, my mother would immediately Lysol and scrub the couch cushions where he had sat. She would make a huge event of it and complain that he “smelled gross like testosterone”, though I never thought he smelled (I thought he smelled good, to be honest) and none of my friends thought he smelled like anything either. I could never figure out what she was smelling.

Right after I first moved out on my own, whenever my mother would visit she complain that my jeans smelled, that she could smell them from across the room. I never smelled anything, and one time she started in about the smell while my aunt was also there, and my aunt said I smelled nice, like fabric softener. My roommate also couldn’t smell anything offensive. I felt insecure about my smell and laundry skills for a long time.

She’s never complained about anything like this ever again. But what could those two instances have meant? It’s still bizarre to think about to this day! [/quote]

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