Reply to Foxhall or Bloom -- would either accomodate a female only practitioner birth (including Dr. Green)?

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Reply to "Foxhall or Bloom -- would either accomodate a female only practitioner birth (including Dr. Green)?"

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[quote=Anonymous]This is something to work through in therapy because the only way forward is acceptance that you can’t control your provider, birth, and birth outcome. Much of pregnancy, delivery, and postpartum is a roll of the dice and you have to adapt and roll with it - same goes for the rest of parenting. There are no female only practices that you can go to (there used to be only one in DC that was only two women and they did not take insurance and they delivered at Sibley - but they closed a few years back) and any practice will have male OBs.

As a trauma survivor, I suggest the book, When Survivors Give Birth. I also suggest training your husband to be a very verbal, vocal, and direct advocate for you and to have him handle telling people if you are a SA survivor if you are comfortable with that. I also suggest you learn to be an advocate for yourself as well. Personally, I had to tell each provider at the hospital and my OB about my trauma history. I had to ask each provider to introduce them self to me before caring for me. If they just ignored me and went to take blood or whatever I would say, hi, who are you? Can you tell me what you’ll be doing before you care for me? Sibley has gotten very good about having their care providers introduce themselves first but sometimes they forget. I also asked it to be noted in my chart that I had a trauma history and I discussed it without going into much detail to my providers and nurses and asked them to alert their colleagues when I went into labor and delivery. I also opted for a scheduled C section. Having good pain control is also extremely helpful, and I highly recommend an epidural. Learning to be an advocate for yourself and your child is a skill you will need the rest of your life and while it is difficult it’s not something you can avoid. A female provider is also no guarantee of a good experience. The female OB who sutured my 3rd degree tear was a total jerk
Who kept asking me, why are you screaming? Well it was b/c the local she had given me wasn’t working, and my tears were extremely Deep. Meanwhile my male OB with my second was way more gentle with pelvic exams and caring about my pain. Female gender does not equal good care. Also getting used to everyone in masks was important for me since that was a huge trigger. Again - therapy can help. 
More caring and gentle [/quote]

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