Reply to advice for talking to parents about downsizing

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is not nearly enough information, OP. But generally, I treated my parents[b] like they adults they were[/b]. How they live their lives is up to them. Why do you need to give them unsolicited advice. There are a million threads here arguing the different sides about how to treat elderly parents. Most people land on the side of treating them like children. Please read Atul Gawande's Being Mortal and see if that helps you reframe your thinking.[/quote]

My mother was no longer mentally an adult. She was in an adult body, acting far worse than toddlers with poor reasoning skills. You could not talk to her like an adult, yet she wanted to be treated like a matriarch. I think your response assumes they stay fully mentally capable. There is the reality of safely maintaining a home, frequent scammers calling and/or arriving at your door, having things like the social security number where anyone can see and so much more. It also assumes there will always be healthy adults able to jump in as needed. With parents living longer too often there own kids have health issues and other things requiring their time and cannot be there for the emergency and more often than in the past an adult child can even pass away.

We though the age-in-place moneymaker where you hire an agency to manage thing really was a disaster (and that could be a whole other thread), but I could see it working if the person stays in great shape and then died quickly.[/quote]

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