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[quote=Anonymous]I’m sorry, OP. I have a year like that spanning 2011-12. I don’t remember the next year at all  as if my brain just stopped doing anything but keeping my body alive.

I did lose faith a bit that year. I cut everything out of my life that wasn’t essential, and that included some activities and friends I used to love and enjoy. I also made some big choices that were probably too fast and too reactive. When I could not see a purpose for myself or understand how I fit into the world, I tried to force it by making aggressive and now-regretted changes thinking that was where god was leading me. I think I should have sat with the despair and grief rather than trying to react it away.

I was so hurt and exhausted that my prayers had become just the word “help” over and over. The only sign I had that god existed was a stray dog that showed up in my yard. In the terrible times that followed the acute tragedies, that dog was a sign that I wasn’t going to be left alone.

If all else fails, try just a simple prayer for help.

OP, I know there will be a sign for you. [/quote]

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