Reply to Resentment - impasse over home improvement

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[quote=Anonymous]OP this is one of those marital impasses that is really, really hard because you’re both right! You both have totally valid perspectives.

BUT. He is on the status quo side, which usually wins.

Like having kids or another kid.

I think you should maybe try couples counseling about it. But you need to be okay with the fact that it’s unlikely to change the outcome.

The best thing to do is probably to move on with finding happiness in the things you can control and just accept the harm to your relationship that being on the losing side of this is going to cause. It’s not small, but also unlikely to be something you divorce over, right? Couples counseling can help you talk about it. The reality is that both people take some big hits along the way.

If and when you move, understand that the house as you buy it is how it’s going to stay. Or have any renovations agreed to and DONE BEFORE YOU MOVE IN. Lesson learned.

Keep an eye on listings in your neighborhood because moving is comparatively less disruptive than a big renovation. 
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