Reply to Husband Told Me to Call My AP

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Here is the situation:  I worked at a large law firm.  I had a relationship with a partner that went beyond professional.  I felt I was not in a position to say no, and I met for dates over several months.  I agreed to an out-of-court settlement with the Law Firm.  My partner and I no longer work there.  My H knew nothing about any of it, as it all occurred while he was on extended TDY.   He found the settlement documents on our shared household computer.  H said he is more upset about my hiding the whole settlement than the fact that I might have had an affair.  He says if I was indeed sexually abused at work, why wouldn't I tell him, and further that I hid the settlement from him is a breach of trust that cannot be repaired.

I have always felt with his constant travel that H is never there to take care of me.  Now, I need him when I have a back injury and he won't help. [/quote]

Your husband is absolutely right to be upset that you concealed this from him, particularly the lawsuit part. It's generally very poor form to get upset for how someone discloses their assault, but I think he is being way more hardline about it than the situation calls for.

Do you want to be married to him? If not, don't bother with the score keeping about his travel vs. his stated availability. If you do, honestly, OP, why? This doesn't sound like a great situation.

I also don't know what TDY is, but that doesn't seem material.[/quote]

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