Reply to Would you set your friend straight about her much older boyfriend?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My friend is 37 dating a 52 year old. He’s never married and has no kids so you get the picture. She is convinced he will marry her and have kids with her.  From what I see he isn’t interested and is too independent. [b]He has actually complained to me before we all met for a diner that my friend doesn’t understand he isn’t interested in having children[/b]. I feel bad for her and she keeps talking about being patient with him and she will wait for him to come to his senses. [b]She has started wearing a wedding band ring on her ring finger to give him a stronger hint[/b]. What would you do if this was your friend? [/quote]

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He talked to YOU and said she doesn't understand he doesn't want kids? It was way out of line for him to toss that around with you casually while you waited to start dinner, FFS. He either was hoping you would tell her what he said, which was an attempt at crappy second-hand communication on his part, or he just has no concept of why it's inappropriate for him to blather to her friends about something HE should set HER straight about.

Bold sentence above #2:

Your friend's tactic with the ring is horrible "communication." Adults should not "hint" like this; it's game-playing. She's hoping he'll come through with a romantic proposal and then of course she'll be able to sway his thoughts about kids. Frankly your friend is thinking and behaving immaturely.

Definitely try convincing her to freeze eggs as others note. In your shoes, I'd probably butt out of the rest of it, though I'd be sorely tempted to tell her point-blank that performative "hinting" about marriage is not communication and she needs to act her age and use her words. [/quote]

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