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[quote=Anonymous]Do most parents do this? I have a 14 year old son and while I have access to his phone and he knows that I can look at it at any time, I generally do not read any texts and when I have occasionally in the past they have all been totally fine. Well, a few days ago I noticed a text thread from an unnamed person so I did read that text and looked at another.

The non-named thread was between him and a girl, nothing odd except that she was unnamed and they clearly did not know each other well. A meet up at maybe a soccer game was mentioned which worries me, but it's probably ok aside from the fact that he hasn't mentioned this to me. I want to discuss it with him but I know that if he thinks I'm looking at his messages he will just tell me less. I do of course require him to tell me where he goes and who he is with, and mostly have that parent worry that this "girl" could be a predator. Deeper down the text message line were some texts with another girl, who I do know, that was less appropriate. Sexual questions of what have you done or not done, etc. Not terrible but I really do not like it or feel like it was respectful to ask her these questions.

I'm not sure the best way to handle. Any suggestions? I do think that he deserves his privacy, room to grow and make mistakes, etc. without mom knowing and reading everything, but I also want to be sure he is both safe and respectful. I can take devices and apps away etc, but things that result in him telling me less and hiding more won't be beneficial. I am not ready for a hormonal teen![/quote]

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