Reply to What did you do about ‘fairness’ if one child’s education costs a lot more than the other’s?

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Reply to "What did you do about ‘fairness’ if one child’s education costs a lot more than the other’s?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You're going to get a lot of different answers to this. I fall into the camp that things don't have to be "fair" constantly and that things tend to even out in the end. Although that's how my parents approached things. One person might go to graduate school, one might not. One might want a big wedding, one might not. One might have many kids that you end up helping, one might not have any. There are so many things that help balance out finances over the course of a lifetime that it's hard to try to balance it out on purpose. I know that there are a lot of different ways of slicing this though.
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I agree.

DS has learning disabilities and ADHD that cost us in expensive neuropsychological eval, tutoring and meds. 
DD recently developed an auto-immune condition that necessitated several surgical interventions. 
DS chose an expensive private university (with merit, but still!).
DD can choose whatever the heck she get into.

Who knows what the future will bring, who will manage what burdens?

Whatever your line of thinking is, share it with your children, and listen to their opinions. Lack of communication is what makes adult children believe they're being short-changed, when usually, none of it is intentional.
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