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[quote=Anonymous]The emotional affair feelings are really really intense and the high is really high.  But similarly the guilt and the post-relationship crash is incredibly, incredibly miserable and intense and you didn’t even get to have sex with the person.  So it’s not like your husband just got these great romantic feelings with no downside.

Prior pp is also right that as a married woman, you can find an appealing guy to sleep with you any day of the week, no matter what you are looking for.  The only downside is that it is a guy who is willing to sleep with a married woman and who is likely married himself.

So basically you get to make the choice and decide who you want to be- do you want to be a cheater because your husband was?  Or does it matter to you that you’re not that person?  I don’t actually judge.  I think there is a whole section on surviving infidelity about people who cheated after their spouses cheated and I forget the term but it sounds like it’s no picnic and just as fraught and miserable as when their spouses cheated on them.[/quote]

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