Reply to Knowledge of my dead parent's long-term affair is incredibly painful

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]After my parent died, I discovered their long-term affair and I'm questioning so much. I thought my parents had an unusually happy and satisfying marriage. They both certainly behaved that way -- in words and deeds -- in front of me, the rest of the family and friends. Was my deceased parent acting the whole time? Wouldn't one need to be nuts to be living a double life and to lie so convincingly over a long time period?

My deceased parent lied so much: lied to the AP about big and little things and lied to my still-living parent. I know that my still-living parent found out about the affair, but didn't realize that it went on for many years.

I thought that I had been very close to my deceased parent. But given the volume of their lies, how do I know that they actually loved me? Is someone who tells so many lies and lives a double life actually capable of love? And did my deceased parent love my still-living parent? At least once a week, my deceased parent would talk to me about how much they loved my still-living parent. Was that all a lie?[/quote]

Can you for God's sake at least use correct pronouns?  What do you hope to gain by concealing whether it was your mother or father was the cheater?[/quote]

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