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[quote=Anonymous]Last night DH said something really rude and thoughtless (and inaccurate!) related to our shared finances. The finances aren’t the point and they’re quite healthy, so I won’t go into tedious details.

In the course of this discussion, he became really rigid and stubborn and somehow flipped an insult he had lobbed at me into the conversation being all about his hurt feelings. He raised his voice and pouted and then stormed away not talking and spent the night on the couch.

This is a pattern- he says something unkind, thoughtless or rude to me, escalates the situation when I tell him he can’t treat me like that, and then walks out of the situation, turns on the silent treatment and sulks around as if he’s the victim.

He absolutely can never be wrong and I’ve seen him argue with our kids in the same stubborn way. Part of me thinks that whenever he realizes he’s behaving badly he deliberately tries to twist the situation to cover his shame/embarrassment and make me the bad guy. Is that a thing? Does it have a name?[/quote]

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