Reply to Anyone make it work (not just stay together) for the kids?

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Reply to "Anyone make it work (not just stay together) for the kids?"

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[quote=Anonymous]I feel like this is pretty much us too. I think it must be common, because what percent of married people are still head over heels in love with each other at year 10?

I think it's more than just doing it "for the kids." It's also recognizing that neither of us really wants to start over with new partners at this stage of life, that even if we are super in love anymore, we do actually like each other as people and appreciate each other as co-parents, and there are huge advantages in life to being part of a team instead of going it alone. We do things for each other all the time. We cook each other meals. I make sure our car is always in good working order. DH always replaces all the lightbulbs around the house. If one of us is really stressed at work, we can sit and vent about it to the other and we are supportive and encouraging and willing to listen to the same complaints over and over. We know each others families and put up with them and also listen to one another complain about them with total understanding, always on each other's side.

I don't have a single other person in my life who will do that stuff for me. I mean if I was rich I could hire people to do some of it but (1) I'm not rich, and (2) it feels better when someone does it for you for free. It makes you feel more valued.

Our marriage has little to no passion but it does have trust, respect, understanding, loyalty, compassion, etc. What are the odds I will find that somewhere else, at my age, as a single mom? Close to nil. I think my DH feels the same way.[/quote]

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