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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Google the 180 method and do it for yourself, not to get him back. Detach from him emotionally and treat this relationship like it’s a business deal in your mind, but keep playing the dumb wife.

Consult a lawyer and [b]get your ducks in a row[/b]
Don’t share your plan with anyone who might out you
Get therapy

Is he aware that you know about the affair?[/quote]

What specifically? This phrase is used a lot. [/quote]
For me it was:
-Consulting several lawyers to learn my rights and how a divorce would likely play out
-Joining a support group from a local nonprofit for women contemplating divorce
-Individual therapy
-Taking and hiding the kids' passports (his AP was in a another country and who knows what liars and cheaters will do)
-Opening a credit card and bank account in just my name
-Getting cash back at grocery stores and other places
-Telling two very close people what was going on for my own support and sanity (this was invaluable!)
-Getting wheels in motion to start my own business
-Screen shots and photo copies of all important finances- house appraisal, property taxes, bank accounts, investments, retirement accounts, 529s, mortgage balance, car payment balance, tax returns etc[/quote]

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