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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Do you know for sure she doesn't want to do this anymore? I ask because being able to maintain relationship and responsibility norms is sometimes what ill/recovering people want.  It gives them a sense of normalcy, purpose, and inclusion.

However, if she's going beyond her capabilities at this time, then I agree with PP that finding help for you dad makes sense.  Local senior centers often have these resources and some hospitals/health centers have social workers who can be a good resource.[/quote]

Come on, PP. Surely you get it. OP's mother cannot provide explicit instructions on every practical aspect of their lives if she's physically disabled. It's difficult. A lot of teaching involves live demonstration, and she cannot do that. The next best thing is watching a Youtube video, but for someone who has such profound executive dysfunction, he would need to be prodded to the exact one, and then bumble about in the kitchen wondering which pot to use because it doesn't look like the one in the video. Your father probably has inattentive ADHD and may be borderline Asperger's, there are lots of those in family with a similar life profile who can't seem to get their act together.

If you have free time (ha!), you might want to go there, show him how to use the washer and dryer, how to cook basic things, how to pay bills, etc. This is what I did for my teen son before he went off to college. 
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