Reply to How to muddle through something you hate and no end in sight?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You’re going to have to tell us the activity so we can commiserate.

The answer is that you focus on why your kid enjoys it and find one part of it that you sincerely enjoy. For my kids’ various activities that aren’t my favorite, that includes:

-chatting with other parents who I love at one activity
-bring outside in good weather at another 
-watching older kids do really awesome stuff 
-good snacks at events for one of the activities
-indoor padded seating at a certain winter activity 
-the camaraderie of the girls’ team at one of the activities

Now the “hate how my kid is treated thing”- that is a BIG problem. Let’s shelve everything else because I think that’s what you should be telling us about. Is it by coaches? Student leaders? Fellow activity participants?[/quote]

I can't give too many specifics.

A sport. Nepotism (parent coaches, for eg). Cliques (if you're not "in" with the family members of the coaches, you're just not treated that well.) Coaches way too involved in the players' personal lives (BF/GF stuff, it's known who the coaches don't "like", etc.) SUPER competitive people who are, quite frankly, just rude in their communications and personality.

Kid absolutely does not want to quit. Senses the problems but, thankfully is unknowing on SOME level, but def feels the hurt of long term friends choosing the "in" folks. Kid recognizes it can lead somewhere else and is trying to use it for that (Kid is talented and being recruited).

I know this doesn't sound horrible but I'm purposely leaving a lot out.

DH already doing a lot of the "face time" lately. But it's starting to raise questions b/c of how involved I had been at the beginning and trying to get things off on a good footing (the one coach I already knew -from prior parents of the team- was going to be . . . . interesting so was hoping to make as nice as I can. And I'm finding I can no longer do this.) Having backed way off b/c I'm not sure how good I can continue being at hiding my feelings, I'm getting the "where have you been?", "I didn't see you at XXXX" . . . . Or they're asking DH. I'm trying to figure out how to be present/involved in healthy ways and just ride this out. [/quote]

Don’t worry about the questions.  If you have other children, say I was busy with Larlo.   I have taken on more work.  DH and I divide conquer- so he has this activity more right now…….  Then ask them a question about their recent trip to…… what they are doing for Thanksgiving……
 How about those Orioles…..

[/quote]

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