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[quote=Anonymous]My ILs do not currently live near any of their children. They live in an older house that is completely unsuitable for their ages and all kids have put on a united front of asking them to move into something without stairs and ideally with little/no upkeep. ILs agree in theory they need to move but have been putting it off. I know this happens all the time- it happened with DH’s grandparents as well. Well now there’s a medical issue and they really really have to do something ASAP.

For various reasons everyone expected them to eventually move close to one particular child. They have announced that instead they will move near DH and I (considerably further from their current home than the other sibling). I’m fine with this, and all siblings are mostly fine but surprised. DH is ECSTATIC. Like I’m really surprised how excited he is. When they first announced this he went wild looking for good situations for them and making plans. It was very sweet. Now they have stalled again and nothing is happening and DH and siblings are getting increasingly stressed. I am torn between trying to advise DH not to get his hopes up (they may end up staying in their totally inappropriate home due to inertia and eventually we will have to hire round the clock care). I honestly don’t want that to happen- it would be nice to have them close and in a more stable situation. But my DH constantly gets let down by his parents saying they will visit or do x thing and then he’s crushed when they don’t. And this is a big thing and he’s really excited and now also really stressed and thinks he can figure this out and find something perfect that will do the trick to get his parents to move. But I just don’t see how DH and siblings can do anything to get his parents to actually take action. So far I’m just listening and trying to be sympathetic. There’s nothing else to be done right? They have to actually make the decision for themselves. [/quote]

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