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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My parents have been educated about CPR yes. Everybody seems to believe it’s a lack of knowledge and so it keeps being explained to them again and again.

But they philosophically want everything possible all the way to the end. They want to maximize life. As in literal life, drawing breath, not quality of life. No one can believe that this is their choice but it is their choice. I know it may be not the norm but if we are giving people choices and saying we will respect their wishes it feels like there should be some support for their actual choice. And with the elderly, I just feel like there isn’t that kind of support for their choice in the way that there is support for hospice.[/quote]

I had a family member who felt similarly and we had the same struggles to provide support at home. Finally we sat down and laid it out--the only way to honor their choice in terms of medical intervention was to move them into a facility where the medical interventions they wanted were readily and quickly available. We involved them in every aspect of looking for that place, so that they felt like their needs and choices were being honored. Ultimately they chose an assisted living center with an adjacent skilled nursing facility (and the option to move from one to the other if needed). Although they mourned the loss of their home, within weeks they were fully engaged in all kinds of programming and opportunities that weren't available to them before and they felt supported in their medical wishes. I think the key for us was being honest about what wasn't on the table and giving them as much freedom to make the choices that were an option. [/quote]

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