Reply to Should I encourage spouse to quit stressful job?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think you guys should sit down and have a frank discussion about all this.

What would scaling back look like?
How would she feel if she quit and couldn't get another job?
Is there something she can do with her current job to make things better? [/quote]

And OP, your initial post on this thread is actually a pretty good script for what to say to her. It lays out your concerns for her mental and emotional health as well as the practicalities like health insurance re: your ages, etc.

Approach the conversation from a place of support and love, putting the concern for her at the forefront and maybe framing the practical concerns as secondary. It is extremely good that you are so willing to do things like cut back your overall lifestyle/spending if she wants to stop work, and that you recognize and respect her when she says she feels she's missing time with your DC (which in itself is, to me, top priority).

I would talk to her and then ASAP schedule sessions with a financial adviser to get third-party, outside eyes on this. If you don't have one, many banks provide this as a free service to regular customers.

You sound like an exceptionally supportive and sensitive spouse, aware of her personality ("worker bee") and needs, while also able to anticipate some issues here, such as her need to work/do a good job but also her feelings of missing out re: your child. I think the two of you are well positioned to deal with this as a team, unlike many couples in posts on DCUM. Best of luck to you both, OP. [/quote]

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