Reply to Anyone else lose their groove during Covid with young kids and still not have it back?

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Reply to "Anyone else lose their groove during Covid with young kids and still not have it back?"

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[quote=Anonymous]The family stuff is an open wound that will never fully heal. Sometimes it scabs over and you barely notice, and then something comes along and rips off the scab and it hurts all over again.

It makes the decision to have just one kid harder. you want more kids so you can finally experience a large, warm, loving family that you never had yourself. But at the same time, it is almost impossibly hard to build that 2+ kid family if your own family was crappy and your salary is too low to afford paid help.

The crappy family of origin has such a domino effect on life. You never felt you had a solid footing because your parents didn't give you emotional support (not even talking $$, just talking someone who was like, "i believe in you, you can achieve your goals"). You have a kid during covid and you realize that not a single person in your family has your back not even in an emergency  (i'm not even talking babysitting! just like, if you and your spouse were simultaneously hospitalized, they would somehow step up and watch your kid temporarily).

Low self esteem from crappy family leads to later childbearing and lower wages. Before you know it,  you're in your 40s and you're like WTF happened.

that said, if you really want another kid I think you should go for it. really. it is not too late, and there are a lot of 5 year gaps in siblings precisely because of free public kindergarten. Your kids can take out loans for college but they will always have each other.[/quote]

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