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[quote=Anonymous]I (40F) have a generally good relationship with my mom (70) and talk to her 3-4 times a week. It’s been bugging me more recently that she rarely asks me questions - our conversations are generally her telling me about her day and if I talk about mine, she’ll respond to that. I’ve mentioned this gently before, and she’ll try for a few days, but then revert (unintentionally, I think) to the old pattern.

I think there are several dynamics going on, including that (1) she got used to talking to her mom this way when my grandma was alive and suffering from dementia, which meant she liked hearing my mom talk, but didn’t really participate in the conversation herself; and (2) my parents were pretty isolated most of the pandemic, I don’t think she has friends she talks to regularly, and I think she basically has forgotten how to have a conversation.

My best friend claims their mom is the same way and this is just how moms in their 70s+ communicate. That seems a little depressing, but maybe it’s true. Can anyone give me hope this can change or help me find peace that it won’t?[/quote]

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