Reply to Rules about dating (14 years old)

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I do not allow it or encourage it. A 14-year-old is not in a position to "date" anyone. If they're a boy, they don't have the resources to take a girl out on dates and I'm certainly not footing the bill for his romantic life.

It's fine to like and have romantic feelings for someone, but I don't think it's healthy for kids at this age to have entangled, adult-like, exclusive relationships that come with all of the obligations and rollercoasters that come with engaging in those things. Not to mention the physical ramifications such as pregnancy and STDs.

I think I might not encourage it but would be tolerable of a 17 or 18 year old starting to do that stuff, but definitely not a 14 year old. They're an absolute mental and emotional mess and I've seen too many toxic and destructive boyfriend-girlfriend entanglements to encourage that for my kids at that age.[/quote]

You seem oddly out of touch. You might not encourage it but you're not going to be able to do much to stop it. [/quote]

I think you're oddly out of touch for believing as a parent that you lack the power to set expectations for your kids and to hold them to them. But hey, if you want to be held hostage to a 14-year-old, good luck.[/quote]

It's not one or the other. I have set expectations and am certainly not held hostage. There is a degree of freedom I give my teen with each year. No 14 year old I know wants to go to a restaurant for a date. It's awkward and silly. They do want to hang out at the pool, park, etc which is totally fine and age appropriate. Perhaps unclench a little bit and set REALISTIC expectations. [/quote]

Did I say I don't let my kids hang out at the pool or park? I said I'm not funding my son's romantic life. Because the things they want to do on "dates" involve going to the movies, Chipotle, bowling, Chick Fil-A, shopping at the mall and I'm not funding that for him to impress a girl.[/quote]

no one other than you mentioned any of that. You basically said no dating at all at 14 in your initial response which is what I was reacting to.[/quote]

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