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[quote=Anonymous]Sounds like they will need to go a facility eventually, but you will have to figure out what level of care is needed for each of them, costs of various options, etc.  You don't say what specific health ailments your father has so below advice does not account for that.

In the short-term, can you find a home care agency like Home Instead? they can send out caretakers/caregivers to the home for a few hours per day and maintain some order/presence while you decide what to do.   The hourly rates are high but still cheaper than a facility.   You may start with a few hours a day/ a few days a week and see if that is enough.  Increase hours/ days if needed.

I had a parent in very critical condition who has been in various settings including at home with a caregiver/ caretaker for a few days a week, in assisted living, and even in 24/7 care ($$$$) temporarily.  I isolated what they really needed, took some time off to improve the health conditions that were still reversible.

They are back at home with someone coming a few days a week, with medicines delivered in daily dose packets, regular cleaning services, and grocery delivery.  A home care provider can also clean lightly, buy groceries, etc.

There are also social service agencies who may send out someone like this if parents cannot afford it in the long run.  If you can get services that way, that would be ideal.

If they need to be monitored throughout the day, of course you will need to seek out facilities.  However, I highly recommend trying to figure out an at-home solution and seeing if you can handle it that way first. 
This will also allow you to understand their specific need which is helpful when you search for a facility.
 
Do they need someone to prep meals a few days a week?  Every day?

Do they need to be watched as they take medications?  
Do those meds need to be pre-sorted?  
Do they need regular cleaning services (caregivers can do light housework)?  
Do they need groceries delivered?
Do they need regular exercise?

All of these may be handled at home with a little support and signing on to services.

Even someone coming in 7 days a week/2-3 hrs per day will be more affordable than a nursing home or assisted living, especially for 2 people.

Once they are in the nursing home/assisted living world, the costs add up fast.  It is worth trying to support them at home and then looking for a facility if home doesn't work out.

You may need to have someone trustworthy nearby who can manage mail and some paperwork locally.  Most bills can be managed online.

Good luck--while you or sibling are with them, try to organize their house with signs, specific places for item, etc. so someone coming to help them can have an easy time navigating.  Buy a few locking cabinets to store sensitive items.

If you are truly busy and don't want to worry about your parents, a nursing home/assisted living situation does give you a more worry-free experience but not always a personalized or even healthy option.  They may tell you that your parents needs services that they don't really need, etc.[/quote]

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