Reply to SIL and dad’s funeral

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[quote=Anonymous]My dad died — had been sick, but the death felt relatively sudden as he deteriorated quickly — and my SIL who lives a few hours away didn’t come to the funeral or even send something. We have a close relationship; not best friends, but see each other every few months, she talks to my kids most weeks, we have a text chain.  She did text to send condolences and tried to call once (I wasn’t able to answer the phone and we never connected).

My other SIL (with whom I am less close) lives across the country and didn’t come either, but did send a big food gift for my family.

Since the funeral a few months ago, I have been on group texts with SIL and she’s sent some casual “how’s it going” texts, to which I’ve responded but haven’t engaged much. I was pretty hurt that she didn’t come at the time, and now just feel emotionally distant and that I don’t want to bother to engage beyond basic pleasantries. I think she still talks to kids through my husband, but he knows I was sad and now distant so doesn’t call me over to chat like he used to.

Am I being silly not to repair? I think I need her to take the first step, after which I might be open to it, but is that just immature?
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