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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]No I can’t relocate. I have a husband and three kids. Before my mother moved into the assisted living place she lived about 30 minutes away in traffic. Now it is 10 minutes away from me. It’s been 4 years and every year I grow more resentful. I have a good relationship with my brother and am friendly but not close to my sister. I have tried to explain the stress but they just say they are appreciative but are too busy to visit. As I pull back I am envisioning that the relationship with my siblings is going to suffer because I am going to end up looking like[b] a jerk[/b].[/quote]

And you are petty, too. [/quote]

She's not being petty. I was 10 minutes from my widowed dad and took care of his major needs for a decade while raising a family because I was an only child. Unless you've been through it, you have not idea what a time suck it is, especially if you work, have a spouse, and have children. Besides handling all the doctor's appointment, meals, medication management, shopping, home repairs, etc., I also handled a condo purchase and sale, two moves, researching and doing paperwork for a retirement community, all communications with staff and daily check-ins at said community, more doctors appointments, hospice arrangements, funeral planning, and dealing with the estate after death. My SILs have done similar things for two parents that lived to 90 and beyond and a single aunt. It's a lot of work and you do it because it's the right thing to do, but it's stressful and can be overwhelming at times. I had no choice since I was an only child, but OP is absolutely right to ask for help from her siblings or pare down her role. [/quote]

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