Reply to My Mom was just diagnosed with breast cancer

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’m sorry, OP. It’s good they caught it early. Wishing her health and you strength. [/quote]

I don’t think it’s early unfortunately. She is almost 80 years old.[/quote]

Oh goodness I am sorry. Has she shared whether she is opting for treatment or simply palliative care?

There is no rulebook. She needs to be the one to decide what is helpful to her and what isn't. You could present her with choices of things you would like to do to be helpful. My mother is the same age and I disagree it's generational to hide. In fact, my mother and my MIL would have minor things like a non-melanoma skin cancer and hype it up and expect is to hear every single detail and come cater to them.

How old are your kids? What and how you tell them depends on ages and personalities, but it helps for you be able to be calm as you tell them. It also might help to know stage and her choice of treating vs letting things run their course with pain management. I would focus some on how fortunate she is to have lived a long and rich life so far and how fortunate "we" as a family are to be able to have enjoyed so much time with her. Whatever her choice is I would emphasize respecting her wishes. You can also come up with them for some things you all can do to show your love-varying by age...make cards or buy cards, making some meals, visiting and planting her favorite fall flowers in the garden or whatever-very individual, but it helps them feel like they are doing something to make her feel better.[/quote]

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