Reply to Working Parents Who Aren’t Tired — Tell us your schedule or secret sauce

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[quote=Anonymous]DW and I have a pretty good lifestyle setup, yet our house always seems a mess, we don’t have time for our own hobbies, and are exhausted 24/7.   We know some families who seem to make parenting and life effortless — please tell us what we are doing wrong!

Work: Dual Fed (we prioritized work life balance), both GS15, both 3 days TRO requirements. DW - TWTh, DH - MWF.  Typically 40 hour week jobs, some deadlines make for longer weeks but nothing to complain about.

3 kids. One going into 9th, one going into 6th, one going into 2nd. So 3 school drop offs/pickups (oldest are in 2 diff parochial schools, there wasn’t a k-12 that worked), youngest is in walkable neighborhood public so in a couple years will walk themselves to school and back.

Activities: no travel sports. Usually 1 rec sport per kid per season or school based sport. Weekly musical lessons twice week for all kids (different times). Oldest does some clubs at school so few weekends late nights for that. Adults try to go to gym 1-2 times a week if can.

Family fun. We never hire a babysitter so, no date nights. Weekends are usually kids with friends or have friends over, and then rest of family will go to museums or hike or pool etc. typical stuff. Usually mornings sat is a big laundry and extra cleaning day. Sunday morning is church and Sunday school.

Typical day: I wake up at 7am and drive two oldest to their schools — done by 830 and head to work or WFH. Whomever is WFH that day pops out at 4 to bring them home, and then continues to work till 530 when they start dinner.  Other parent drops off elementary kid and gets to work by 9, then returns home around 6.

At dinner time we make 3 types of dinner: vegetarian, omni, and picky. Two vegetarians so think sautéed tofu, omni may have broiled chicken, and picky has pasta. Everyone shares ina roasted vegetable, salad, maybe potatoes and rice. Usually simple fast meals started by WFH parent, so dinner done by 630.

One parent may duck out with a kid to rec practice or music etc depending on time schedule — will have dinner either before or after.  Maybe help homework or read with youngest for those home.

Everyone heads to bed around 930, then adults clean dishes and tidy the house, and usually deep clean one project or another.  May head to gym some nights.

We have a cleaner come every two weeks for deep clean of kitchen and bathrooms.

Hard to find time for other cleaning projects, household projects, or yard work.

Spouse thinks most people just have more energy and efficiency than we do; I think most people order more takeout meals, probably have family help or regular driving nanny, or are just as frazzled as us!?

So those of you parenting with ease what can we do? I know simplyfing meals would help, but vegetarians are militant, and doctor says to accommodate picky eater for now.[/quote]

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