Reply to Should I tell my daughter I don’t think her boyfriend is right for her?

Forum Index » Adult Children

Reply to "Should I tell my daughter I don’t think her boyfriend is right for her? "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]You have an adult child and an instinct to meddle. This is the danger zone. It's SO EASY for you to ruin your relationship with your daughter. Here's how to think about this:

In the next 10 years, you get THREE instances where you provide unsolicited advice. Three. Over 10 years.

Save them for when you need them - a drinking problem, an abusive boyfriend, a mental health issue, an immediate issue of health and safety. About to make a huge mistake. Not "blah boyfriend at 19."

If you do this, she will listen those three times. If you don't, she'll get so used to screening you out, she won't ever listen to a damn thing you say, she'll never seek your counsel, AND you'll ruin your relationship.

I still remember when my dad, who never gives unsolicited advice, told me very seriously to never, ever, touch flood waters when I was in a city that was flooding. It really stayed with me, and it made me take that warning VERY seriously.

My mom was a steady stream of unsolicited advice (not how she would put it!) and honestly, it trashed our relationship in my 20s. It's rebuilt now, and at almost 40, we have a great relationship. But those lost years she'll never get back and I never listened to her anyway. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics