Reply to The flaw in all the "How to live a happy life" books/articles/etc

Forum Index » Off-Topic

Reply to "The flaw in all the "How to live a happy life" books/articles/etc"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]I sometimes feel this way too, OP. But I do want to make an observation. You say:

[quote]But the people who I feel a spark with, those I'd like to get to know better, already have full social plates. Usually I'm drawn to other parents who 
- love to travel and explore the local area and always trying new things (vs. just hanging out at home or doing the same kids activities each weekend) 
- are smart critical thinkers who don't blindly follow either progressive or conservative views but really enjoy deep discussions of complex issues 
- have a sense of humor 
- don't subscribe to the whole UMC anxiety-inducing industrial complex of raising kids [/quote]

I think that describes my DH and I. But if you met me once or twice, you might not realize this. Like that last one -- I HATE the UMC industrial complex of raising kids. But I think sometimes people just assume I subscribe to it because I'm UMC and have kids and live in DC. I often get the impression that people think I'm obsessive about parenting, but I'm not. I sometimes feel pressure and anxiety over the way people seem to expect me to parent (which is why I hate the parenting industrial complex! I don't want to feel pressure/anxiety over my kid's math scores or whatever) and I might express that anxiety. But a person who doesn't know me might take that to mean I'm bought in when in fact it means that I'm not bought in.

We are definitely independent thinkers politically and love talking politics. But I've learned to keep this to ourselves when we meet new people because we don't want to alienate neighbors or parents at our kids' school by saying something that doesn't conform with often rigid expectations of what is the "right" thing to think. I only tell people my real political views (which are lefty but not blindly agreeing with everything Democrats do, and I probably have more tolerance of certain non-prejudiced, non-MAGA conservative beliefs than your average progressive) once I know people well enough to know they won't freak out if I express something that isn't 100% party line. It's not worth the downside when you have young kids who might get punished for someone disliking you.

So you might want to consider that some of the people you meet who you aren't instantly drawn to might actually be the kind of people you want to meet. But it's hard out there and they are dealign with the same challenges you are. They might be cautious and need to feel you out a bit more before decided to show you their "real" selves.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics