Reply to Is Your DH on the Spectrum Too? How do you Deal?

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[quote=Anonymous]Every Autistic person is different. DD was diagnosed ADHD and then ASD. MIL was told that DH was "borderline Autistic" when he was younger but everyone just laughed it off, except me when my DD was diagnosed the puzzle started coming together. He definitely has social skills issues (doesn't get sarcasm, speaks in half sentences sometimes or needs a translator).  But, he's well liked and has several life-long friends from HS and a huge circle of guys he golfs with etc. He also had trouble holding a job until he found the perfect field for him and started his own business. He is very empathic toward our DD, because he gets her like nobody else does. He's got skill deficits for sure - I do all of the cooking, executing, etc. which can get tiring. But he's so loving and sweet that it makes it worth it - he also takes care of EVERYTHING that involves numbers, all of the bill paying, etc. and he has endless patience so he does all of the driving around of the kids who are both now teenagers.

Just saying, for the parents who are worried about the future. Watching my DH and hearing his mother's stories from when he was younger gives me hope for my DD, although she has more mental health issues than he does. He's sort of classic "Asperger's" (early reader, strong in math, loner as a kid), but he somehow learned these social coping skills that have served him well, and for whatever reason he is truly, truly, interested in other people and empathetic. He listens to every single detail people tell him with sincere interest and remembers them (sometimes weirdly do, but ya know).  He's also incredibly persistent.

Not to toot my own horn but I think part of his success has been finding the right person who believed in him and appreciated him. His family of origin did not, especially siblings. He was (and is) hard to live with in some ways, but they never found a way to focus on the strengths. [/quote]

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