Reply to Anyone else realize how crappy their own mother was once you became a mother yourself?

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[quote=Anonymous]I have a 2.5 year old a newborn (3mo old) and have only really been able to clearly see what a crappy mom my own mother was. I was confused for so long because I grew up in a stable, UMC, 2 parent family with no major dramas but really zero emotional warmth and connection and just thought that was somewhat normal for everyone for so long.

My dad is wonderful but a workaholic so my younger sister and I were with our mom most of the time who was a SAHM but was just lazy and yelled at us all the time, pitted my sister and I against each other and seemingly always took her side in every conflict. My teenage years were pretty rough but luckily I did really well in high school and was able to go to a top college far away and settled down a plane ride and time zone away. I'm not close with either my mom or sister to this day but see them a few times a year out of a sense of obligation. They get annoyed that I don't want to spend all of my scarce vacation time schlepping halfway across the country to see them so have taken it upon themselves to crashing my vacation (DH and I have started our own little nuclear family tradition of spending a certain week in a certain place and they just happened to book their own house in the same town).

I turned out fine on paper - nice job/husband/kids/house in suburbs etc. Not really a question but I guess I just really find it so tedious to spend time with them and want to make sure I don't repeat this pattern with my kids? Can anyone else commiserate?
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