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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]First, understand that you are addicted to your AP. You have been getting dopamine hits for a year through texts, meetings, sex. Suddenly those hits are gone and you are desperate for a fix.

Second, your AP's family is moving to your neighborhood?!? And  the wife threatened you? I'm sorry but I don't think this will go well, unless you get ahead of it by telling your H what choices you made. There is a real phenomenon that Betrayed Wives will lash out at the OW, despite the fact it's the Husband that hurt them. But it is too hard to face that the person you trusted most hurt you in such a manner, so the anger goes elsewhere. So prepare yourself for the truth to come out at some level.

And third: I know you're feeling overwhelmed and lost and confused.  But lady, get a hold of yourself. You made choices and now you will have to deal with the consequences of those choices. I know that may sound harsh, but I am saying that as a wife who had an affair and then a d-day and all of the aftermath of those. The issue is not your marriage, or your husband ("I want my H to want me in the same way as my AP"...I'm sorry but that will never happen, as your H is "real life" and your AP is "fantasy and secrets" and obviously the fantasy is better than the reality). The issue is within you. You need to talk to someone who is not your H (can you imagine how he will feel when he realizes he was comforting you because you got dumped by your AP?). Maybe a close friend, better even a counselor/therapist. You have a lot to sort out on why you thought what you did was okay, and why you made choices that eroded your own integrity and disrespected your husband, your marriage and yourself. Nope, sorry, it's not just because "he didn't want to have sex with me." There are other ways to solve that issue that are healthier than an affair.

Again, I'm sorry if I sound harsh, but this is a case of the hens coming home to roost. You now have another choice...think about the kind of person you want to be moving forward. You can choose lying and cheating or you can choose honesty and authenticity. What kind of person do you want to be?[/quote]

Yes, they are moving into my neighborhood. Not next door, but a half mile or so away. She has no idea I live here.

I do not want to be this kind of person. I don’t want to feel this way. The logical part of me knows that I’m being utterly ridiculous. I’m having trouble getting out of bed today. [/quote]

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