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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I think you are in the gray zone where you can see the trajectory this story is on, but those involved either can't all see it, or won't. There is a way of your DH very calmly and non-judgmentally making it clear that he wants to help, but he can't help unless he has access to information about what's going on. When they are both ready to share that ( at least, any of them that can still make decisions), then he can try to help. Not sooner. And then you have to sit back and watch it get worse. You have to know that the long-term financial outcome might have been much better if different decisions were made earlier. You have to find a way to be okay with this.[/quote]
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