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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I agree! My husband went to the house, took FIL to lunch, was pleasant and helpful. The wife will not produce the papers for him nor tell him where they are. He asked his father if he wanted for him to help out with the finances. FIL said, "yes." At this point, the only tactic I can come up with is to make an appointment with an attorney, drive his father over to him, and remake the papers at our expense. It is a question if the lawyer will deem FIL capable or not at this point. He's pleasant enough but gets confused easily. He doesn't know what accounts he has or where they are. My husband does not like to make waves and is kind of spineless. He reverts to "I just don't know if I care enough." It's not my family so maybe I need to let it go. The only complication is that I am the only source of financial support for my family. I am not willing to help FIL financially if my husband will not address these issues. [/quote]

What? Ok. You said yourself you have no legal authority here. She is the wife. If you try to commandeer your FIL and drive him somewhere to do -- what, exactly?--, she would be well within her rights to tell you to step off. His accounts are her accounts too and you can't just seize control. 
I'm sympathetic that you don't want the money wasted and FIL to end up broke, and the wife is being evasive (probably because she feels bullied), but what exactly are you asking your DH to do? No attorney will re-do the papers because they are married so their assets are likely joint. If the wife doesn't agree to it, and FIL can't accomplish it himself, this isn't happening.

Don't wreck your marriage expecting your DH to achieve the impossible. [/quote]

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