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[quote=Anonymous]I’m so glad you are working on this. I had a very difficult time with my sister, a year younger, with opposite temperaments, and she died in high school before we could repair things.

I think making the shared room work is key. Perhaps they can choose some things together for the room, like tiny lights. You can try to help the messy one confine her stuff to her area. If the older one has a friend over, find something for the younger one to do.

I also would praise every sisterly action you see. If one has an accomplishment, help the other one make her a congratulatory card.

You can also talk to them about what being family means to you and ask them their views. If respect is always modeled in the home, they will pick it up. You can say something about competition to them when you see it. “I wonder if your feelings are hurt because Charlie wants to play with Susie and not you? Do you know that it’s not because there is anything wrong with you? It is just life.”[/quote]

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