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[quote=Anonymous]My DD is in 5th grade and has had the same best friend since kindergarten. Toward the end of 3rd grade there were lots of shifts in friendships and groups/cliques started forming. My DD has always been pretty social and gets along with everyone, and has lots of friends as a result, but none as good as her best friend. Their personalities are completely opposite, but somehow that works for them.

Starting in 4th grade DD’s friend started pulling away from the rest of the girls in their grade and decided she only wants to be friends with my DD. She is very intense and possessive of their friendship, and at times manipulative. The BFF does not get together with any of the other kids in their grade (her mom tells me this) and doesn’t seem to have any friends outside of DD, and she always wants to hang out with my DD every single day and anytime they are together at school or another activity (they aren’t in the same class thankfully). My DD has made friends with some of the other kids in her class this year and I have pushed her to expand, but it feels like her BFF is making that as hard for her as possible, and beyond that, I feel like she also holds my DD back in many ways.

For example, their school does a talent show at the end of every year, and my DD was really excited to do it but then her BFF talked her out of it because she didn’t want to. My DD was even invited to do a dance with some other girls but her friend talked her out of it so they could sit together and just watch everyone. BFF guilted her into it because she didn’t want to have to sit alone and my DD said she felt bad so she would sit it out even though she wanted to do it.

Today, all the girls were at a birthday party that my DD was excited about but BFF didn’t want to go and tried to talk her out of it. BFF’s mom forced her to go, and she literally cling to my DD the entire time (was physically grabbing her arm or pulling her away from others) and they practically hung out in a corner just the two of them the whole time (parents hung out in a cafe and could see into the space). Neither was participating in the party which is unlike my DD, but her friend kept dragging her away.

What do I do to ensure my DD doesn’t become too exclusive with one friend and alienate the rest? I already encourage activities and getting together with others, but she genuinely loves hanging with her BFF and gets a ton of pressure from her not to hang with others.
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