Reply to Marriage Structure and Resistance to the Gender Revolution in the Workplace

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[quote=Anonymous]I don't think it is as simple as the article points out.  Maybe my life is an exception but the exceptional part is the choice my husband and I made--not us.  I have an advanced degree and I chose to stay home to raise our kids.  I worked with my husband for several years before we even started dating (we were both involved with others) and know that his behavior towards women was respectful and professional.  I wouldn't have dated him if I had seen otherwise.  After we married, we decided to live on one salary to see if we could afford to have me stay home if and when we had kids.  The result is that we live in a much smaller home than many of our dual income friends and we have no plans to buy a second home.  We live very comfortably and within our means on one salary.  Many people see the new combined HHI and immediately make decisions that foreclose one parent or the other from staying home.

Nonetheless, women are the ones who have to take leave to have kids and that time off does impact their careers.  I often had to step in and work on projects when colleagues were on maternity leave.  Sometimes I got a great review for my willingness and ability to step into the breach to help out the office.  That wasn't me trying to undermine my colleague as she was home with her kids but it did happen and I am sure many men have made lots of career progress as women are out on maternity leave.  I don't think that is a reason not to have kids and I don't think those men are necessarily anti-working women.  I just don't think it is that simple.

I know that some men are simply disrespectful of other women and in my experience it had little to do with what their wives did (stay home or work).

I agree that home values have increased to reflect a two income family.  But homes/townhouses/condos do exist for those who want to have one parent stay home and raise their kids.    [/quote]

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