Reply to can you maintain a relationship with family if your sibling is a mooch

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[quote=Anonymous]By letting it go and recognizing that my parent gets to decide how they want to live their life and manage their money. That I am better off spending my energy caring for me and my family. By not talking to my parent ever about finances and not touching any topic that has anything to do with money and my siblings.

Decades ago my parent made clear that they would no longer be helping me emotionally or financially. Not a total surprise considering how my parent singled me out growing up. It stung but it propelled me to launch myself and get a life, profession, family going asap on my own. Parent went on to support siblings in many ways including rent until they were 30. Yea, it stung when I found these things out but I didn’t expect anything from parent any longer.

I have good relationships with parent and siblings. I have strong boundaries with parent. With siblings I do not bring up financials. We are all adults and it’s none of my business and it’s a topic that doesn’t benefit me and that frankly I don’t have the financial need which helps too.

The truth is a lot of parents don’t have completely “fair” relationships across their kids. Maybe it’s more obvious in some relationships. Sometimes it’s about money, sometimes not. But trying to pursue fairness or getting people to recognize sibling as “mooch” or overly dependent is a futile cause and waste of your energy.

My advice - work through the emotional stuff it brings up for you and work toward letting it go. [/quote]

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