Reply to What do I owe my parents in terms of eldercare?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You don’t owe them anything. That said, offer as much as you feel comfortable. For me, I contributed my time and effort to navigate the Medicaid process to get them into long term care. I asked my sibling to help with some of the financial paperwork but did most of the work myself. My parent lived with me for a few months (paying way below market room and board), but after a fall and long hospitalization, I refused to let them come back (fall risk and no one at home to take watch, house inaccessible). My obligation was that they were not homeless and medical care taken care of. I was not going to damage my finances or family dynamics or sanity by having a dependent elderly person in my home.[/quote]

You charged your parent to live with you?[/quote]

LOL seriously. Some crazy hard-hearted people on DCUM. OP, you should know you're dealing with an entire range of how to see one's relationship with parents, from healthy to wackadoodle crazy.

Sounds like your parents have your other two sibs nearby and a lot of interaction with them already anyway. Why worry?[/quote]

I wouldn't say I'm worried, I just want to be thoughtful in how I approach.

I don't want it to seem like I am disinterested in their welfare or unwilling to help, as neither or true. Distance makes it hard but I would like to be supportive and helpful. I guess I'm just wondering what others have done in similar situations, living far away with siblings near parents, and what this means your role is.[/quote]

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