Reply to When did you let visitors come see you after giving birth?

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Reply to "When did you let visitors come see you after giving birth?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]1st baby: My father and stepmother (mostly stepmother) barged their way into our home right when we got home from the hospital. She was the opposite of helpful.

2nd baby: wised up and didn't tell people when I went into labor except the person watching Baby 1, and my best friend. Best friend came to our house the day we got home, dropped off food, and took the dog and Baby 1 for a walk, then left.

We had a nanny for Baby 1, and DH and I spent two weeks with 2, and didn't tell anyone until after two weeks. "Surprise! We did a thing" kind of announcement. Then we said, "our phones are off, door is locked, we are going to focus on adjusting to being a family of four for a while but after April, if you've had your Tdap we'd love for you to come by if you're in the area to meet the newest member of our family."

We really didn't worry about people being offended or thinking we  were obnoxious. We were so miserable with what happened with the first baby that we set strong boundaries for the second.

We hired a night nurse for six weeks for each baby. [/quote]

I’m happy this works for you, but it sounds so sad to me…[/quote]

Agree. Also judging "surprise we did a thing"[/quote]

+1 that sounds so horribly self centered. I hope they don’t need to rely on people in the future [/quote]

Don't you think it's okay for a new mother to BE self centered right after giving birth?  I do. We rely on the people we hire, and the people in our lives who respect boundaries. We're happy. Nobody needs to be sad for us. [/quote]

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