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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Im white and married an Asian man. I’ve come to realize that we will never have couples friends because most white men do not want to be friends with an Asian man. I think it’s because Asian men are not seen as traditionally masculine, which is what white men gravitate toward. It’s very odd because I’ve noticed white women have no problem being friends with Asian women.  We’ve been married 25 years and I’ve come to accept this. People shy away from anyone even slightly different than themselves. [/quote]

OP here. That sounds really frustrating and is an interesting observation. I will note that I am married and we have couple friends who are a white woman with an Asian man. I think my DH does not read as traditionally masculine either (one of the weird things about us) so maybe that's part of it. I am the odd one out in that friendship, of course :/ But I do think you are right in general that white men seem not to gravitate towards Asian men or even just men who don't read as traditionally masculine in specific ways.

I agree people seem to shy away from anyone slightly different than themselves. Sometimes I feel like I almost fit somewhere but there is always something that impedes connection, and it's so frustrating that the disconnect is something different every time. So it's not like I have "one weird thing." It's like the combination of traits and background and interests in me is just off enough that there is no one who can get me, or who wants to.[/quote]

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