Reply to I worry so much about my 13 year old DS

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is my son.

He is now 18 and finishing his first year in college.

He is still the same in many ways, but life is beginning to toughen him up. He is learning that the world (teachers, friends, potential girlfriends, random adults) do not put up with his BS statements the way his mama did too often.

And if he wants to stay in this college that we are paying big bucks for, he is going to have to maintain a certain GPA. That, finally, has gotten his attention and he is realizing that his definition of "effort" is not cutting it.

OP, your son will eventually feel consequences that matter to him for not following through on things. If he goes to school too often without brushing his teeth, someone will tell him he has bad breath and will start a big to-do that may eventually reach the entire grade, about how he stinks.

Rather than console him when he's embarrassed, realize that this is the best thing that could happen to him.[/quote]

This is actually a great point.

Around 13 we had to have more direct conversations with our son about certain things.

"Look, I don't care if you don't want to put deodorant on, but you will quickly become known as the smelly kid in school."

"I don't care if you don't want to style your hair, or if you don't want it cut.  But if you think any girl would be interested in talking to you when you look homeless, you're wrong.'[/quote]

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