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[quote=Anonymous]Thinking of you both, and Yes to the “Year of Magical Thinking” by Joan Didion.

I too recently have entered the grief club in a more intense and intimate way than I have before in life. It has made me realize how bad we are as a society at being able
to hold space for one another. I feel guilty at the lack of
care I was able to hold for others in the past due to not “knowing”. A few close friends and family have made all the difference to me in what has been my first week. One sent lunch without asking more than “will you be home on this day”. Another sent a heartfelt card and cake. Another showed up with a potted plant. While this all may sound material, they were tangible and useful reminders of being held by my community. They were acknowledging that I was numb and staring into space. Another friend has just texted daily and let me say all the things. Others who know, good friends and acquaintances….are clearly where I was before. They want to be thoughtful but don’t know how or what to say. They expressed their immediate condolences and then moved on to asking me about mundane things or trying to distract me. I know they are well intentioned. [/quote]

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