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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Why should your parents be making the effort? You and your siblings are the ones who moved away. That was a pretty clear signal that family ties aren’t actually all that important to you. If you want this dynamic, YOU volunteer to host holidays, even in your hometown if that is a central location that is easy to get to for many.

I don’t expect my mom to host my dad’s side of the family (and my dad doesn’t do anything like that), so when the spirit moves me to get my siblings and cousins and aunt on dad’s side of the family together, *I* clean my parents’ house, pay for a big pizza party, and clean up afterward. My siblings usually help a bit if they are around.

I invite my parents to visit a lot. It’s not a general “you’re welcome anytime,” it’s set dates that we work around. I also have worked out a rotation with my sister (who lives far away) for Christmas and Thanksgiving, so we celebrate with my parents and then our respective ILs in a rotation that doesn’t step on any toes. My brother lives pretty close to me and joins in our holidays.

Also, if you want loud big fun boisterous, you can always include friends in holidays, or have slightly offset holidays like Friendsgiving, or a big New Year’s party.[/quote]

^^^And I should note that I live 10 hours from my parents, so when I get a dad’s-side reunion together, it’s a big deal. My mom’s side more naturally gets together with a rotating group of aunts/uncles/cousins who are willing to host, or have people stay with them if a big clump comes out here to visit, for example. The point is; if you want to do something, make it happen?[/quote]

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