Reply to Advice needed---- elderly parents, one with dementia...baby of the family, siblings issues

Forum Index » Eldercare

Reply to "Advice needed---- elderly parents, one with dementia...baby of the family, siblings issues"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]It's impressive that your mom isn't declining. How is your father coping? Is he overwhelmed by her care? Are there aides?

For the record....Memory care is only like a prison for those who wander and have other needs where they need it to be that intense. There are different levels. Plus, many places have both AL and Memory care so she might qualify for AL and then if she needs more intensive care she moves to MC. When someone with dementia is that unsafe aging at home becomes a prison too. You get special locks for everything and they have to be closely monitored.

You have to look at your father's needs too. If he truly is fine, that is great and he may be happier having her close. If he starts getting burned out it can take a toll on his health and make him decline faster so keep an eye on things.

You can hire an aging professional to periodically assess level of need. You can then have that person take the lead in a family meeting. If someone chooses not to be part of family meeting, let it go. Just give the siblings a chance, but let them be who they are.

What's "best" for your parents is so hard to quantify. Some parents insist when cognitively fine they want to age at home. Is it safe to have winding steps and a lot of things can not be altered for aging? No, but sometimes you just have to accept their best is not your best. My mom chose a best that has her rotting in front of the TV. Breaks my heart when she is a social person and she is declining so fast, but she chose this best when cognitively fine and refuses other suggestions.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics