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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You sound kind of bitter, so that may continue to fuel this negative dynamic. My DH was neutral and unaffected, so we were able to turn the relationship into a positive one. Try not to take her behavior personally.[/quote]

Yes, DH is neutral, but also accustomed to MILs ways, and accepts that MIL is not really a nice person, and that won't change over night (or ever).  So, I think I have to get on board with his way of thinking.  It is difficult at Mother's Day and MILs birthday, because I have to prompt him to call her, but I probably just have to drop the rope.  I guess we tend to think that all families may be like our own, while we are young and still growing - in adulthood, it becomes clear that that is just not true.  No family is perfect, obviouslySo, I don't think I am bitter (who knows), but I do think that MIL helped form an opinion of her that is unfavorable, whether or not that was her intention.

It is weird when you expect a family you marry into to be warm and curious about you, and the ILs have rarely, if ever asked anything about me over the years - they really don't know me. [/quote]

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